Oh maaaaaaaan, you guys! You have blown me away with your comments/messages regarding my last post. I appreciate the warm welcome back, not to mention knowing some of you can relate to dealing with life’s ever changing-ness. You’re the best.
So with the whole break-up/new chapter thang has come a little bit of clarity. Okay, make that a lot of bit of clarity, actually. I’ve taken a renewed commitment to living my life with intent, and saying yes (and no) to things with mindfulness and authenticity. I realized I’d somehow, in the last year, allowed my allegiance to my heart and gut to slip, and let far too many people and things in when they probably didn’t deserve a spot in my life. That’s precious real estate, folks… we all only have so much time each day/week/month/year, and your attentions and commitment should be to all that enriches your soul and helps you further celebrate life. People and things that invigorate you and challenge you and make you better.
And so, this new chapter has begun with clearing out the weeds. Saying NO with intention, and meaning it.
I feel like I’ve heard the term “soul suckers” before in relation to sortaaaa what I’m talking about here, but that sounds a little aggressive, don’t you think? But those people or activities in your life that add stress, or tear you down, or poke holes in your resolve or your spirit (even subconsciously)? Yeah, those — you don’t need them.
I have always been a big advocate of giving people the benefit of the doubt. I hope for the best and I believe most people are truly good, and like to assume people I’m willing to invest my time in and spill my secrets to are true and genuine and investing their own time back in me, and that even if they make mistakes or disappoint you at times, they’re still worth your patience. Here’s the thing, though, loveys- eventually, if a person constantly lets you down or betrays your trust, it’s not fair to your own heart to let them stay in your life. Respect yourself enough to walk away.
Respect yourself enough to say no.
Good vibes only, you know?
And ohmigosh, everyone and their mother is always telling you these days to stop doing the things you don’t really shout-from-the-rooftops LOVE, and I’m here to just reiterate that. If working out at 5am is adding anxiety to your life, stop. If talking to your ex is making you sad, stop. If checking social media is stressing you out, stop. If you don’t truly enjoy something (like running or drinking or racing) but are making yourself do XYZ because you think you’re supposed to, oh man – stop. Just. Say. No.
It’s fine. I promise. All of it.
The world will not stop spinning because you decide so-and-so is not worth squeezing into your schedule, or because you no longer want to volunteer after work making care packages for orphans in India. You are not suddenly becoming a terrible human being.
You’re just being true to yourself. And hey- high five for that!
Being almost 29 is a nice reminder to cut the junk out and focus on what matters. Ain’t nobody got time for that. So yeah, I’m saying no….. a lot more than maybe I ever have.
But I’m also yes-ing a lot, too. More on that in the next post, k?